Freedom from Victimhood

Surviving abuse involves at times an ongoing process of forgiving. By forgiving I mean releasing them to God to be free of victimhood not forgetting. But when the memories come back, what do we do with them. It took time but I have gotten to the point of praying as soon as they come back.

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So this is a raw post but one I felt the Lord leading me to share. As a child, my home was a nightmare at times with a mentally ill mother who played mind games and an alcoholic father. That should be enough said without going into details.

Fast forward to when I was in my early 30s. I began to feel tired and had trouble making it through the day. It continued to get worse as my health declined with my first bout with chronic illness. That first bout was so severe that I was close to multiple organ failure until one day I said something to my doctor that rang a bell for him. He tested me and found I had a dead thyroid.

I spent a over a year recovering from that. When I saw my mother, which was rare, I told her I had a dead thyroid. She asked me what my TSH test number was. I told her. She gleefully and proudly told me hers and walked away. That was when I found out what I had was genetic.

When I told my father after that, he said, “your mother never told you?”

Had I known about the genetic predisposition, I would have asked to be tested every year and could have avoided the nightmare of three years of declining health, over a year recovering, and the process after that of getting my life back together.

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The mind games of my mother and the negligence of my father continued into my adulthood. They have both passed away. Yesterday the memory of that time came back. So I prayed over it. I said to God that I hoped my mother had made her peace with him and thanked him that my father had.

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By doing so, I stepped away from being trapped in victimhood. Jesus wants to set us free. He said so himself. Jesus who is the truth said in John 8:

“Then you will know the truth, and the truth will set you free.”

The truth is that Jesus loves each of us and values us so much that he left heaven to be born as a human baby, so he could grow to be a man and die on the cross for us.

The truth is that God wants us in his family.

There are so many more wonderful truths in the bible to learn. It starts with coming to know Jesus. Then he begins the process of setting us free.

Thank you for reading. God Bless.

59 thoughts on “Freedom from Victimhood

  1. So appropriate in a way to what I just posted 😉
    He certainly does love us, no matter what.
    And in the same way, we should always try to show that love to others.
    Talking about Him is wonderful…. SHOWING Him, even better! ❤

    I have uttered many prayers the last few weeks. Sometimes I am not 'feeling' the comfort I want to… but I know it is there – my truth is not based on my feelings.
    Thinking of you and sending up a prayer for you too.

  2. Thank you for sharing and being so real. I’m sorry for what you must have endured and praise God that He is working restoration and healing in your life. I believe your post will help many others. God bless.

  3. Matt, thank you for sharing this.
    Many of us identify with how the forgiveness process works in stages.

    At first, after my clergy trauma, I found that I could not forgive.
    But, I kept praying : ‘Lord, I want to forgive. Help me to forgive.’
    God has been faithful. I am able to forgive, although some things still trigger me.
    God bless you. ⚘🌼

  4. I am so very sorry that you had to grow up like that Matt…….it really breaks my heart but I am grateful we all have a loving Father who is there for us no matter how our Earthly parents behaved.

  5. It is important to step away from victimhood and the lies we have been told and realize the truth is found in God. Lord bless you, brother!🌼🦋🌺

  6. Praise the Lord that He can free us from victimhood. You have a powerful testimony, big brother. I am truely happy for your sake that you allowed the Lord to heal you of those old wounds so that you can forgive your parents. I pray that He will do a miraculous work in your physical body. Bless you.

  7. I love this post dear friend. You have proved that your faith in Jesus has liberated you from every bondage. Even the chains of the bad memories and abuses can be broken down when we trust Yeshua wholeheartedly. Halleluyah 🙌. I rejoice in your freedom brother. Yes, it’s tough to forgive and forget.

  8. Hugs and love to you Matt! I’m so sorry you experienced this but I can see Jesus shine so brightly through you — through your words and your bright personality on blogger chat❤️
    I’ve experienced so many hardships beginning in my childhood, some of which has distorted my reactions to things even now BUT thank the Lord I’m walking with Him now and He navigates and loves me unconditionally.

  9. Thank you for sharing your story brother Matt. I’m so glad you were able to overcome by God’s grace. I feel bad that you had to deal with chronic illness but you make it look like you gained a lot of knowledge and experience through it all. You’re a very good human being brother Matt….I fall often….I don’t know ….I yo-yo between peace/forgiveness and resentmemt/despair……but learning from your story….I’ll try to let go….at least for today😅….keep writing such genuine motivational posts brother….and maybe someday I’ll be able to get to the level you’re at….Hugs 🍫🧸🍫🧸🍫🧸🍫🧸🍫🧸🍫

  10. Thanks for sharing your story big brother. It’s amazing how God has restored you and used you to touch so many lives. You’re proof of the freedom we have in Christ from the past.

  11. Thank you for sharing your story with us, May the Lord use it to help others. You are a testament to God’s power and faithfulness.
    What a blessing that your father made peace with God.

  12. This one made me teary. I’m sorry that happened to you, but glad that you have learned valuable lessons about freedom in Christ. I was fortunate to know that thyroid disease ran in my family. I was also fortunate that I was also able to find all of the information I needed before hand to ask the doctors to check my thyroid antibodies when she claimed that my TSH was normal. Here doctors don’t consider you out of range until you are way out of range.( 10 – 11 ) My antibodies came back elevated, so she agreed to start me on Synthroid. Thanks for sharing your story.

  13. Thank you for sharing your story and i thank God He gave you the strength to forgive. My mother has personality disorder in which she used control and verbal abused. I had to learn forgiveness, and I agree, it does set you free.

  14. You spoke to me.

    I grew up in a family with a mentally ill mum and a bishop Dad(Unavailable)

    That life affected me so much, In my 20’s have seen my relationships slip out of my hands. People love me but I always feel the love is never enough.

    The Grace of God is sufficient for me and you.

    Sending you love and light.

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